Social Isolation and Depression

First of all, being new to this site, hi everyone! I had my brain tumor somewhere about 9 years ago and ever since, I've felt emotionally estranged from the world. I was in middle school when it happened and I didn't really have a strong network of friends to support me at the time. Not to say that no one did, but that was just while I was sick; once I was actually out of the hospital, I was very much alone. I've just felt that, ever since the tumor, I've felt shockingly alone and without anyone who can understand where I've been and what I've been through. Lately, this feeling has been swelling and it's bubbled into something more like depression. I'm just constantly bombarded by the feeling that things aren't going to get better and I am forever alone. I just graduated from college and the thing that I want more than anything else is to meet people with a similar set of life experiences to get rid of this feeling of isolation, but I don't really seem able to find "brain tumor survivor" groups. I make every effort I can to be around other people, but I just don't understand the way other people live and think. I just want to know if I'm alone in this or if it's more of a 'me' problem than it is related to my tumor or whatever. I want to reach out to people, but I'm just alone.

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by christine on May 23, 2011 at 5:58pm

I agree with Kayla..I had surgery only a few months ago and I do have the same feelings that you do. It is not that I am actively trying to isolate myself because I try to still do things with my friends..it is just that I don't feel the same anymore. I also feel that they don't understand all of the roller-coaster of emotions that occured following diagnosis/surgery and the knowledge that you had this..in your brain. I think it is a good idea to try to connect with other survivors or to get involved with charities associated with this. It can make you feel good to help others going through something similar.

Permalink Reply by Melissa biggie on July 1, 2011 at 10:56pm

Hey Ian! I totally get where you are coming from. The reason I joined this site is to connect with other survivors. I had a brain tumor at the age of 6 Why I am thankful to be alive I have always felt alone and like nobody understood me.For a long time I have had bottled up my feelings and never really dealt with the fact I had a brain tumor. Recently I have found my self almost feeling angry because I had a brain tumor. Your not alone.

Permalink Reply by maggie brier on July 2, 2011 at 7:29pm

I had my brain tumor 25 years ago with a recurrence 15 years ago. Since then, I've gone to graduate school, gotten married and adopted two kids (I had uterine cancer and a hysterectomy in between the two brain tumors) and, for the most part, not a day goes by that I don't feel lucky to be alive. At the same time, though, I don't think that a day goes by that I don't feel that, somehow, I got really screwed. I think that the hard part is getting used to having those two feelings at the same time and acknowledging that it is okay to have them both.

Permalink Reply by maria toscano on February 16, 2012 at 10:17pm

Hi Ian,

I have been pretty much feeling like you lately. I started having siezures in middle school and was diagnosed at 14. I have always felt somehow less human than everyone around me. I have trouble processing information when I'm talking to people. Everyone says they dont notice but it really hard being in my head all the time and I usually avoid people because I'm afraid getting confused and embarassing myself. I have to say I am impressed though that you stuck with school after you were diagnosed. I ended up getting my GED and am now trying desperately to finnish college at age 28. So at least you have that. Probably not much of a consolation but from my point of view, you have your life so much more together than me! Anyway, thanks for sharing.

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